I want to be a writer again. But I never know exactly what to say or how to say what I'm thinking. That's why I gave up my dream of writing years ago. I could never come up with any good endings to stories. But I do have a lot to say, as long as my words aren't useless talk. Anyway, my head is all over the place lately. I just got home from college. I'm really missing my friends. I've gotten to spend great time with my parents. I even met someone from my junior high years in a christian bookstore today and it's amazing that we would meet there six years later. Also, I've been reading Mary Beth Chapman's new book Choosing to SEE  and it makes me want to get more involved with anything pro-adoption. (And yes! I got books in the library about Lithuania AND Estonia!) God is giving me peace about my school finances. So all in all, life is okay at this moment. :)

Way to build confidence?

Maybe I'm just making too big a deal out of this. Some people might say that it doesn't matter as long as kids are reading, but here goes. So, I'm sitting in the elementary school lobby and I see a poster in the window for the book fair. I take a closer look and three out of the four books advertised have "down grading" titles. "Loser list" and "Diary of a Wimpy Kid". I get that these characters are trying to portray real school life, but couldn't the fair have picked a few more different titles for a variety of books? (Yes, I have read Diary of a Wimpy Kid and it's actually really funny- although I don't always agree with the Wimpy Kid's actions 100% of the time, but that's a different subject to argue.) I just have to wonder if schools and authors really want to eliminate bullying and build self confidence, if this is the best way to be getting kids to read.

I've Been Thinking...

So, I had this idea in chapel today. We were singing a song that had used the lyrics to "He's got the whole world in His hands". So, it inspired me to write during chapel the beginnings of a story. It's from the perpective of God looking at a child in need. A woman comes to her and helps her and the child slowly begins to see love through her. I'm not sure if I want this woman to be a missionary or just anyone or where I want this child to be located or even how the story ends. I'm not even sure if any of that matters. But if I feel inspired, I'll keep working on it more. :)

Courage

Today my heart is just a little heavy over something that happened today (It wasn't as major as I might make it seem) I can't go into detail about what happened, but I was thinking about how children today are pushed into circumstances where they must chose to be very brave. Thinking back to my own childhood (and even some instances as a college student) I would freak out!- over frustration, nervousness, uncertainty. It is both a good thing as well as a bad one. They develop bravery (if it is that at all, maybe coping is a better term) but on the other hand, they develop a hard skin, one that can only be penetratable by genuine love, concern, and trust. Maybe I was just thrown off and what I experienced today isn't typical, but it did impress.

Spark, boom, change!

He's done it again. How can I describe just how thirsty I am for knowledge? The main theme in these past few weeks (maybe even years) has been that God is showing me something new to learn everyday. It can be about something small, or it can be something major. This week is missions week and in the mallway there is a table set up for study abroad programs in Lithuania. *spark* I'm supposed to be learning about Romania right? Maybe, but I'm keeping my mind open. I really want to read more about this country (don't ask me why it sounds more interesting than any other) However, just like the lack of books on Romania, there seems to be a lack of books on Lithuania. Ironic or not? The good news is that even though I didn't find a book on Lithuania in the school library, I found one on Estonia. (Close, right? Maybe? Not really?) I just want to read all day but I have so much homework to do!!!! Currently the other books I'm reading are:
Life Principles for the Graduate (Charles Stanley)
Lies Young Women Believe (Dannah Gresh and Nancy Leigh DeMoss)
Why Pro-Life? (Randy Alcorn)

So, I guess the first step is to just go to the booth tonight and ask for some information...*Boom*

Poverty Meal

This week is Missions week at my school. My roommate and I attended "Poverty meal" instead of going to our usual dinner. Instead of having a choice of several items to choose from, we simply had 1 bowl of porridge. As I'm sitting in the sectioned off area of the cafe I couldn't help but look around. There were students everywhere- many laughing, with huge trays filled with food. That was a new perpective for sure. I get up to the pot and fill up my bowl (which was a little bigger than my fists) with one ladel full. It wasn't so bad. It was grainy, but tasted a lot like potatoes. The more I ate though, the more I was impacted. Sure, one bite is okay, but after awhile it gets pretty boring and it makes your throat sore. What did I do? I got a glass of water. That helped a lot. But it got me really thinking. People eat this same dry mush everyday with no water. Others eat nothing at all. What really aches is that 10 million children go hungry in the US alone and that a child dies every 7 seconds from malnourishment. In an unfair world, it's easy to forget to pray for our brothers and sisters and our children. But let's remember and be thankful for the unlimited supply of nourishment we have within our reach.